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Tag Archives: attitude

What more can I ask for? What had I not thought of myself to be when I was a child? My self-esteem and the character that I had built up for the past 25 years vanished in a matter of just 3 seconds. The moral values which I assumed had existed to be within my soul had just been vaporized and left me with a blank view. I take this nothing but a failure on my side. I always thought of controlling my emotions and prided myself that I can keep a check on most of the life situations. My audacious attitude took a new turn and presented itself over my face over which I was left with no choice but to stare at it right into its own eyes.

June 19th, 2008 will always be fresh in my mind. After 10 months of marriage and 2 and half years of love(which was assumed to be there), I got slapped by my beloved wife. What a strange coincidence that after a few days of making an entry that I have deceived her, I got slapped. And this gives me another opportunity to utter my favorite quote, Fate is not without a sense of irony(From The Matrix). Hadn’t I been a person until now? What could a ‘person’ actually mean? Does it just cater to the dictionary meaning of ‘an individual’? If it is so, then why does everyone, every single person who you thought are the center of your world do not mind what you say and do not respect to what you are feeling.

Why does Love actually inflict upon the cause that whatever is told has to be done or agreed upon? Doesn’t Love emphasize that one should respect other’s feelings and ideas? Doesn’t Love mean that you are supposed to pay special attention to the opposite person? Doesn’t it also refer to the single source of joy when you are with them? Doesn’t it say that all you wish is the joy of that person? Why does Love always say that you need to pay special attention, you need to provide care, you have to cater to their needs, you have to provide the means for their life? Why doesn’t it ever say that the Love given needs to be reverted back? Does it always increase in sharing rather than receiving at least from one person who you suppose is very near and dear to you?

Who can I ask these questions? Who has got the time to answer my queries? Who can appease my views that are taking such a strong hold over me for the past few days? Am I at a loss totally? Is this reversible? My eyes are not able to focus. I will get back later. I need to vent out in one manner or the other.